Far too often, we either use our feelings and desires and skip responsibility to our word i.e. we don’t take into account our impact on people and the world around us if we don’t follow through on our commitments. This is our propensity towards the conditioned feminine.

OR

We cling to our word aka commitments in such a way that we ignore our feelings and emotions and then torture ourselves in the process i.e. we do not practice self-love. This is our propensity towards the conditioned masculine.

In a conversation with a coaching client, we talked about how easy it is to fall into comfort.

The people we connect with, the jobs we do, our bland relationships, how we live our lives, our relationship to money - once we start getting habituated to our environment we can find comfort literally anywhere.

My experience is that the answer lies in a very simple and yet very powerful question. And that question is:

“What do I want?”

OR

“What kind of experience I would like to have?”

I have always been a big fan of learning about Archetypes ever since I started my own personal growth journey.

Archetypes really helped understand different facets of my own unconscious behaviours that I wasn’t in approval of and didn’t want to even acknowledge or see.

In her book - ‘Sacred Contracts’, Caroline Myss proposes that all of us have agreed to play out an energetic contract even before we are born, and the way we play out these contracts is based on how we live our lives.

I have been thinking about this for a while now and the best way I have found to describe it is that I think there is a spot in everything that is true. 

Once we have touched or experienced the spot, it stays with us and we crave going back to it, and feel empty when we are not experiencing it. 

I have been remembering this moment when I was 14 years old when my grandfather and grandmother passed away within 24 hours of each other.

Over the last couple of days, I have had this image that keeps flashing in front of my eyes - it is of my father sitting on the floor in the room next to where my grandmother laid in the verandah at our home. He is surrounded by all the extended family members and is crying and losing control. I am standing next to him, completely stunned. I had never seen him that emotional in my life I never will again.

He touched something deep at a meditation retreat. When he was really young, he lost one of his parents and convinced himself that people he loves will always leave him.

At a glance it might not look like it's a big issue, but let’s examine some of the ways in which this is projected in life.

Why is it so hard for men to show feelings?

I wrote an article about my experience running a men's workshop at the Ministry of Justice in London